What happens in the Toys R Us bathroom...

...should be cleaned out of your purse as quickly as possible when you return to civilization. The last time we were at toys r us looked like something out of a slap stick comedy routine. Imagine me with three kids, a GIANT cart with a strap that barely clicks shut, and no diaper bag because I thought we weren't going to be long. I've got one child who is a runner and afraid of toilets, another who is going with the flow in very literal ways, and the other who is obsessed with washing her hands. Miss hand washer was successfully attempting to climb from the cart, while the oldest was fearfully keeping her from the potties even though she was actually moving past that to get to the sinks. Not to mention the one really needed my attention. None of them understand the concept of privacy. Thank God no one came in to witness the scene that was me trying to clean up the poor kiddo while keeping the others safe and feeling completely unequipped. I had no plastic bags even so I did what any resourceful desperate mother would do, I stuffed everything I could into my pockets and put the dirty pants in my purse :\  Did I mention that I only just recently started trying to carry a purse instead of or with a diaper bag again?  I might need to put that off a bit longer...

This is very hard for me to admit people: I can't be every where at once.  Really, it's true (hanging my head in shame)-  I have to utilize the ability to contain these babies when needed. Something has to be better than trying to cram a full sized shopping cart into the large stall in the bathroom.  And something has to contain the others not in crisis better than that ridiculous cart.  Who designs those anyway? They've finally started making them with straps that have a double locking action so I'm sure there's hope for the next in line who have to use them ;)

The logistics of more than one kid- let alone three- are obviously a bit interesting.  I thought I was a pro when our second son was born.  I had it all figured out.  Things like unloading them at the house, well that was cake for me.  Although I'm a scatterbrained hyperactive type, I'm able to harness aspects of that and organize my efforts in such a way that some events just flow :)  And then there are times when it doesn't flow at all. Now, I'm not just unloading a toddler and an infant into a house- this is a whole new level of multitasking and planning.

As frustrating as some of this is, I know where there's a will, there's a way to success.  My oldest is already potty trained but the younger two are seeming ready at almost the same time. Here's some parts that are coming together on my much needed plan for potty training success:

• I have a potty seat in the car. 
• I also have a large bag of emergency type items: extra clothes etc.  
• I hadn't been bringing much into stores with us lately because it hadn't been relevant.  Time to revisit that! So a "go in' diaper/purse type bag is going to need to expand to carry extra clothes, and for the love of it plastic bags!  
• I hadn't been using my stroller much because the kids tend to fight being in it (everyone wants to walk these days!) but that's going to have to be rearranged somehow.  
• I need my rewards system to be able to follow me- I know that being proactive in other aspects of parenting is very effective and I'm sure this is no different.  
• Postits in my bag to cover the automatic flushers
• Hand sanitizer 

Wish me luck!  I'm willing to take tips from anyone and any advice on the next phase would be awesome!  We've recently entered the waiting-until-we-are-no-longer-at-the-potty-to-go phase with the oldest.  I'm thinking I might also just plan to be spending a LOT of time in bathrooms.  It seems like as soon as we move on and are out, another will need to go back out again.

Bathing in Muffins

"We don't bathe in muffins guys!"

Those words actually came out of my mouth the other night.  And yet there they were, swimming in a small sea of waterlogged muffins.

The thing about bathing in muffins, is that you can't really appreciate it at the time.  At the time it is exhausting, almost infuriating.  How did they make it past me to accomplish that?  Why am I not "enough" to stay on top of this and am I "enough" to clean this new mess up on top of all my other tasks? It's frustrating in the same way that, a few years prior, you'd have been frustrated having your printer break the night before an important essay is due. Only it's like that all the time.  There are days you just cry- and no matter what your intentions, sometimes you can't help but loose it a little and do so in what ever setting the urge overwhelms you.  And then your oldest reminds "You 28.  Let's think about it.  You not a baby" - and you just want to laugh and cry more.

You never realize it will "be like this" when you go into parenthood.  My momma never said there'd be days like this.  Really, and I'm sure I'm not the only one here, our culture really doesn't give us the heads up on parenting it once did.  When you think about a time where there was no power and people's socializing revolved mostly around their family units, you can see how the fast paced world of today makes it hard to end up with full disclosure before parenting.  And while that's really another post all together, I must mention that I'm not sure when, if ever, the shock and awe of raising young children will wear off.

The first rule of parenting is: You have a choice.  I think really that's the first rule in life too but to remember that I have choices on a daily basis is sometimes the only thing that keeps me going.  When I was younger, I struggled greatly with choices.  I'm still very indecisive.  But I'm learning more and more how empowering choices can be. I can choose how I react to any situation.  Sometimes I'm gonna chose to be grumpy.  And that's okay too!  But the very first thing I want remind myself in any overwhelming moment is to be aware that I'm making a choice.  And to the muffins, and any other crazy making moment in motherhood- I choose to be grateful.  I'm grateful it was muffins and not some other less desirable substance waterlogged in the tub.  I'm grateful my kids love each other enough to conspire together- how ever developmentally simple that conspiracy is.  I'm grateful that even though I might make a choice to be grumpy in one moment, I can chose to laugh and appreciate it later.  So here's to muffins and the other beautiful frustrations of parenting that stretch and empower us to be more than we ever realized we were capable of !

Welcome

No one told me that the older I got, the less sane I'd feel.  Really, this "loosing it" has been a shocker. And while I'm sure I'm not the only mother out there to feel this way, some of them really seem to have it so together that I have to wonder if it has to be this way.  Maybe some of us are just more prone to the deep end than others?

I am a loving wife of 7 years and a mom to three children spaced in a 31 month span.  My husband is in the military so we move and our lifestyle has a few quirks.  But I will try not to discuss that end of my life much.  I want to make it clear how abundantly proud I am of my husband's service.  As a family, we commit to serve too by supporting his efforts and calling.  Plus he's pretty good at what he does ;)

Our first two, 16 and half months apart, were boys.  The last, 14 months later, is a girl. Being that there are so few girls to my husband's family (that aren't married in) we've had an interesting time finding our footing as parents to boys and and a girl.  Instead of GI Joe, there are fights to watch My Little Pony.  Although I'm sure that could happen anyway and I'm enjoying my life of Dinosaur Tea Parties.  Some of having a girl made me harder on my own self.  Maybe that is exactly what God intended. They are wonderful children, amazingly bonded and connected. We have been very blessed, however hectic things might get!

I needed a place to share some of the crazy with you though.  Like maybe if I could share and make a few others smile, I'd be able to manage my own stress a little better.  When I walk into a bathroom where the kids have decided (in the two minutes it took me to be prepping for their bedtime) to climb into and fill up a tub while fully clothed... Maybe the next time that happens, I can approach it a little more light hearted knowing that I'll have some where to amuse others with it later.

It is a privilege to raise children.  I take my work very seriously. I am sure if I approach this duty correctly, there is abundant joy in it.  Our lives are filled with treasures and moments that make me consider myself a very rich woman.  I have been blessed with personal convictions, positive spin, and energy that help me every day, even if I have weaknesses and faults that I grapple with.  I will never get these years back.  And as surprising as it seems, one day that might be upsetting ;)